Still here. AND I have not progressed since last week (not that this surprises me... I have never gone into labor dilated past a 1.5). I am feeling quite uncomfortable. At the doctors today she said, "you're baby is so high!" as she went to measure me. I don't carry high, and I don't carry low; I carry everywhere. It is IMPOSSIBLE trying to convince people that I have a short torso, especially being a 6'0'' girl; but I do. Considering I am over 39 weeks, I still appear fairly small, but I carry all the way up and down.
"That baby is right up under your chest!" She exclaimed. Chest, I don't really notice...ribs I do.
"Yes. He is in my ribs all the time", I told her.
Then she went on to talk induction which, I am superly duperly against (JUST FOR ME. I don't think it's "wrong" and I do know it can be medically necessary).
It was a rather discouraging appointment. I didn't love hearing comments like: "yeah, you're way past where you've ever been before" (at this point, it's only two days). Or, "Oh, by 41 weeks you'll want to be induced; you'll see".
I did have my membranes stripped along with another comment, "I did the best I could considering you are still only dilated to a one".
I also get lots of "advice" on how to go into labor. Let me just say, I have never worked so hard for ten days straight...ever. I have worn myself out. This doesn't even include the miles I have been walking. I even walked 4 miles before my appointment this morning. Lets just say most of the advice doesn't even register on my work scale for the past week and a half.
I even had someone tell me today that the reason I have such a "small" belly (it sure feels big to me), was because I was so wide. Gee, thanks.
Alright. Done complaining. I did want to document my feelings on the day. I don't often struggle to keep it in check, but today I have.
On the flip side, I am super grateful Brooks is still healthy and strong. It IS easier to get done what I need to with him on the inside still.
We were also able to majorly scrub our house again today (I did it really well last week with my little sister as well...like I said... I have been working hard), and I LOOOOOOVE me a clean house. I even asked Dave today if I was neurotic about cleaning :).
I am grateful for my strong body. The doctor mentioned again today that I have "strong anatomy" that is well fit for holding and growing children. If I ever got pregnant with multiples, I would be confident in my body's ability to carry them well. I also feel like it allows for me to get pregnant as many times as I want, and I won't be limited by what my reproductive system can handle.
I do know that when Brooks is ready, Brooks is ready. I don't want to rush that. I know that his timing will be the right timing.
I am enjoying yummy treats up until Brooks comes, then will swear off all junk/sugary food until the baby weight is g.o.n.e. and I am very excited about the cookies we will be making tonight!
Lastly, I am really grateful for the generosity and kindness I have been shown. So many wonderful friends have really helped me physically, emotionally, spiritually, and mentally. The offers of help have been numerous and frequent. I have been truly blessed with wonderful people in my life.
2 days ago
2 comments:
You are definitely not wide, that person was being very thoughtless! I always go late and like you try to look on the bright side - "my body is so good at carrying babies, it's in no hurry to get them out" lol. He'll be here before you know it. I can't believe they were talking about induction when you hadn't even reached your due date, how discouraging and dumb.
Ugh, those last few weeks are so hard, hang in there. I admire you so much for not jumping on the induction bandwagon- you're right, when baby is ready, baby will come. There is still some important development that can happen in the womb, even at week 39+. I still think you look fabulous, though you may not feel it.
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